Guilted Thankfulness & Love

Tonight I came across a picture on facebook that someone had posted. They tagged a lot of people in the picture and captioned it "Sometimes we need to change our perspective. Be thankful everyday." Here is the picture.

Powerful right? The picture by itself is a heart-tugger for sure. The contrast between the sizes of hands of the white adult and the black child clearly communicate a truth we often want to hide from. People are suffering. People, even little children, are starved, abused, neglected, living in filth, and so on. The picture preaches as we say in the church. But then someone added words to the picture that say "You hate your life, whle some people dream of having your life." People have good intentions. I like to think that people do most of what they do with those good intentions. It's hard to get mad at folks for doing foolish things out of ignorance while trying to do what they know to be right. I try to be graceful and humble in those moments because I know I'm a fool and a wreck of a human being as well. I'm sure the intentions of this person who placed these words over the picture were good. My problem is that as good as the intentions may have been this is a guilt trip.

I have written before about how we invest too often and too much in guilt to motivate us. Guilt should never be a motivator. It corrupts the actions it motivates us to pursue because it takes away the purity of motivation. I should care for people who are suffering and be motivated to live a life that blesses them but I shouldn't be motivated to do that because I'm convinced my life is better than theirs. I should be motivated to help the suffering because they are worthy of my love as human beings and because I am able to bless them as a human being. Not because I'm rich and healthy while they are poor and dying. Of course a person suffering is more worthy of my aid because they are suffering but even then my motivation ought to be to love them because they are a human being and they are suffering and not because they are a human being who is suffering while I am not suffering. Even if I were also suffering I should be motivated to bless and extend love in any way I am able. This also means I ought to bless and love those who are not suffering or who are not living a life contrasted with me in significantly noticeable ways.

As stated earlier, the caption to this picture was "Sometimes we need to change our perspective. Be thankful everyday." Again, good intentions. I've seen this a lot while working with the homeless and marginalized. People will come into our world of poverty and see the contrast between their lives and the lives of those I live with and help. They walk away thinking "I have so much and they have so little. I should be more thankful." Yes, you should be more thankful. I should too. We all should. However, it always stings me a bit because while I am joyous to see people gain perspective on their life and on how greatly they have been blessed and thus how greatly they ought to give thanks to God I am hurt that they are motivated to be thankful predominantly because someone else is in a lower or worse standing than them in some fashion. I believe God uses everything to speak to us so I want to be careful here. I also want to make sure nobody thinks I am saying that it is wrong to have one's perspective altered because of experiencing suffering they don't endure through encountering people different from them. I'm not saying that. What I am saying is that, while it is hard and while we need motivation from various places, we need to examine our current perspectives and our changes in perspectives and try to understand we we currently see things and live the way that we do.

I ought to be thankful that I eat well every single day. At the same time I should not be thankful because I eat well every single day while other people do not. I should not be thankful because I have a "better" life than someone else or even because I see I have a good life because they have a bad life. I should be thankful because I have at all, because I exist, because God is good. God is good to the suffering and the abundantly well-living, even if it is hard to see at times. Both ought to be thankful. When I was suffering I should have been more thankful. When I was making good money and had no worries I should have been more thankful. Whether I am on the streets or in a gated community I ought to be thankful. Thankfulness built on guilt is either unhealthy or false thankfulness. It is not thankfulness for blessing but for absence of another person's curse. Then are times when our "Thank you God for what I have"s are more appropriately stated "Thank you I'm not them." That's not real love for God because it's not real love for people. It's love for possession of goods and absence of pains. If our thankfulness is not derived from our love for God and for his blessings (including people) then it's not true thankfulness. How can I be thankful that my life is not as miserable as others? Should I not mourn for them instead? That is what love does. It mourns with those who mourns and it does not simply acknowledge the worthiness of mourning and walk away thinking of self.

When we encounter people, situations, and truths that alter our perspective and remind us of what our own lives, the lives of others, and this world look like and how they itnersect or may not be intersecting (when they ought to) let us not simply walk away with a changed perspective but let us examine our change of perspective and ask "Why am I more thankful today after seeing this?" If the answer is "Because they have it worse than me and i's be wrong for me to not be thankful" we're not yet where we ought to be. We've perhaps made an improvement because we've fund the ladder to climb but we still need to grab the sides and place our feet on the rungs so that we may elevate higher towards God. Let us not be content to be guilted into thankfulness or good deeds. Let us see the truth of this world, the lives of others, and of ourselves, and then see the truth of God and how He loves us all and has been blessing us all and how he has promised to bless us int he future. Let us be thankful for who God is and not because of the contrast we see between ourselves and those less fortunate. Let our understanding and thankfulness for the truth of God spur us to loving action towards those around us be they living similar or contrasting lives and let us teach them thankfulness in a healthy way. Let us lay guilt aside, embracing the conviction that we probably aren't as thankful as we ought to be and we probably aren't as aware or loving towards others as we ought to be and then move forward, being moved by the Spirit, confident and strong in our pursuit. Guilt is a poor and weak foundation for good works. It will break beneath us. Let us learn the difference between conviction and guilt. We must find the foundation of pure thankfulness.

So may you be thankful and live well, paying attention to others and giving them the love they are worthy of as fellow human beings because you live in the knowledge of who God is and how he blesses his children and do not give into the temptation to find joy in the fact that your life appears better or more blessed than the life of someone else, for we know that there are promises for the suffering and curses for the thriving in the gospel.

Wendell Berry on the Death Penalty

As I am made deeply uncomfortable by the taking of a human life before birth, I am also made deeply uncomfortable by the taking of a human life after birth. Obviously, it can be well argued that the world would be better off if certain people had never been born or if they had been killed in early youth by a fall from a tree. And I certainly can imagine circumstances in which I might kill another person. But I don’t believe that mere humans have the mental or moral capacity to decide rightfully, let alone infallibly, that another human should be killed. As I don’t condone the illegal killing of a human by a human, I cannot condone the legal killing of a human by a human. One killing is not rectified or atoned for by the addition of a second. An illegal killing is in no way made better by a legal killing. A society is not made saner or more morally secure by the deputation in it of legalized killers. Whereas many illegal killings are done in hot blood, legal killings are always done in cold blood and with a procedural deliberation that is horrifying. Hot-blooded killing is of course horrifying also, but to me it is more understandable. Probably we have no choice against illegal killing, which continues to happen against the wishes of nearly everybody. But it is possible, morally and rationally, to choose to withhold one’s approval from legal killing, and I so choose.

— Wendell Berry; Port Royal, KY; January 23, 2009

A Short Word on the Death Penalty

There is no way to accept the grace of God, which is shown through Jesus Christ dying for us who were his enemies, while we are willing to call for, support, or be indifferent towards the killing of our "enemies" even when done by the state. Forgiveness is lived out with merciful action or it is no forgiveness at all. Either we value the mercy and love of God shown in Christ and imitate it as we live in a world with fellow wretched sinners or we don't. Either we value life or we don't. We don't get to be rescued from debt and demand others pay up for their debts to us and still be in good standing with the righteous Judge of all. Jesus took the place of the murderer Barabbas on the cross. That's the living gospel. Death penalty? Not if we're trying to imitate Christ. Revenge is not justice. Justice is not tit for tat. Not really. Not in the Gospel. Maybe the authorities have the right to kill but even if they do Christians have the obligation to not kill and to show the same mercy to all others that they were shown through Christ. We do not correct through violence! Love does not harm it's neighbor. Everyone is a neighbor. Love to enemies means nurturing life in them and not killing them. If it were otherwise Jesus would not have ended up on that cross. We would. We NEED this love. All of us. We need to accept it and we need to give it. I am convinced of this. God, if I'm wrong tell me who Jesus would kill. I've yet to meet 'em. But I've met a lot of folks he'd rather die for so that he could POSSIBLY save them (the whole world).

A 9-11 Meditation

Today is a great day for us in the U.S., who know the love of Christ as citizens of the kingdom of heaven, to remember and imitate that love in our hearts, minds, hands/feet, and mouthes by doing good to not only those who we love and cherish but to our enemies who are against us as well. Let us pray and nurture all neighbors whoever they are or have been. Let us praise the God who died for us when enemies and do the same, forgiving and reconciling relentlessly as we were always meant to do. Let us also use this opportunity to stand against unloving action be it by the hands of individuals, groups, or government. Let us say no to destruction, war, and all types of violence and revenge for it is destruction, anger, and hate which broke our hearts to begin with. Instead, let us set an example of what goodness looks like by praying, being hospitible, using kind words, living with patience, offering blessings, meetings needs and speaking life into the lives of all around us, especially those we are in conflict with.

May we not lose sight of our identity as kingdom people and mistake ourselves as belonging to any nation on this earth, tempted to take sides of one people group over and against another, but may our hearts break and our lives be shared deeply with those who we live alongside. May we live in the victory of Christ, holding to the hope of His return and judgment, not allowing fear or worry into our lives. May we share the wonderful blessings God has bestowed upon us with those crying out, gnashing their teeth, wringing their hands, and furrowing their brows (be it for what they have lost or want to take). May we be on the side of all people extending love to them, because we care for what and who God cares. May Peace of Christ be with you.

My Ignorant Racism

I went to Mid-America Christian University for my undergrad. It was a wonderful experience. I love that I went there. They were good to me. Their advertisements are on Revelife a lot (for better or worse). Today, as I was reflecting on racism, being a racialized society, and a divided church, I began to think on my experience in college.

We had chapel twice a week. Each chapel was basically a contemporary evangelical church worship service in terms of structure (announcements, songs, message, songs, dismissal with prayer sprinkled amongst the activities). Most of the speakers were good. Most speakers had a relationship with the school. Most of them were white. One particular speaker was not. He was a very cliche black, overweight, yelling, sweating, pastor. Imagine impersonating a black preacher from the south and you've nailed it. He was great. We loved him. He had passion, he got loud, he made us uncomfortable but it was still safe and it sparked something in us.

When I look back on the experience I grow sad though because I don't believe we truly appreciated him for the reasons we thought we did. I am convinced that we liked him coming to speak at chapel because it was entertainment. We were, mostly, white suburban Christians who were seeing something new. We were entertained. It was like going to the zoo and seeing the monkeys. We were observing something similar to us but different at the same time. We loved him coming into our world, standing on our stage, and doing his thing before us. But only a handful of us ever went to his small church. I went once, maybe twice. It was a wonderful experience. But I did not stay. I did not allow that world to be my world. I kept it at bay. Because it was different, I was the odd man out, it wasn't comfortable, it wasn't what I knew.

Did I recognize those as the reasons I didn't stay at the time? No. Did I recognize why I loved that pastor at the time? No. I thought I understood but I was wrong. I thought my pleasure was innocent when it was quite tainted. We all loved that pastor speaking in our chapel for the same reason we were unwilling to be a part of his faith community. We didn't consider ourselves as the same. We didn't embrace him, we watched him. We were raised to be comfortable, to know the white church, to be consumers and not givers or sharers.

For my part, I repent. I'm sorry. I didn't approach him as a friend, a brother, a body part of Christ. I approached him, naively, as a form of entertainment, less than human. Not because he was black but because he wasn't like I was, and the reason he wasn't like me was because he was from a black community and raised in a culture I never knew and wasn't willing to know. Since then I've entered into the type of communities he was raised and working in. I still struggle with seeing people as I ought to see them, engaging them as I ought to engage them, and forsaking myself the way I out to forsake myself. But Christ teaches me to lose myself and gain a full body of diverse people. In Christ I lose my consumerist and invisibly racist ways and begin to truly value children of God for what they deeply and most truly are. I am theirs and they are mine, belonging to one another, needing one another. I probably need them more than they need me.

What's the point? We have divisions among us that we are ignorant of and in Christ those divisions are brought to light and in our sharing of His death they are crushed. In our resurrection and the sacraments of baptism and eucharist we are unified and we begin to work out our salvation (communal and individual) by practicing Christ's unrelenting love as we see one another as we are created to be (as individuals and communities). May Christ's power break all our divisions. May we allow Him to do what He desires in our lives. May we repent where we must.

Pursuing A Path & Calling

I posted on Facebook than I am once again putting thought into the possibility of doing work with Christian Peacemaker Teams in Palestine/Israel next year. I've been keen on the idea of spending time doing peace work in the middle east for years now. For a while I thought of moving to Iraq after graduation of college and then other good things happened. When I left Ohio I was in heavy debate over the issue as well. Then I was in a relationship that, of course, hindered that sort of activity. Now I'm in seminary and for the last year have been debating if I want to do this CPT delegation after graduation. I can go on a few of these form time to time (they last about 2 weeks) or I can make a 3 year commitment. I'm not sure that's in the cards for me though. A few delegations though? I can see that. Anyway, when I posted on Facebook that I was once again thinking about this adventure a friend wrote to me saying "Well, if you're thinking about it-I don't support this idea. If God is leading you and clearing a path-I do. This isn't something you do because it sounds like a good idea."

I'm glad my friend loves me enough to share her opinion. I'm also glad she wants me to look to God for these types of decisions. I value that very much. It sparked a few thoughts in my mind about callings, path clearing, decision making, and so on. I asked her why it couldn't be both. Why could our path not be open, full of options, and requiring that we use what we have been given to make God-honoring decisions? I believe that God is pleased with His children doing what they will so long as they are in His will. If we use our gifts, passions, and minds then our individual options become quite narrow. For instance, my heart beats for nonviolence and for the Church witnessing to the world through loving the oppressed and marginalized. This type of political, nonviolent, defending work is right up my alley when it comes to my passions and interests. I can not explain why I have an interest in this field but I do. This passion also reaches to the poor, homeless, addicted, imprisoned, and those who abuse. I care for victims and oppressors and want to show them the way of God's peace and sacrifice. I can't say why, it just clicks for me. This is not true of many. The Church is like a body made of many parts, performing different functions, all doing the work of God. We all have specific giftings, talents, passions, experiences, and so on that lead us to pursuing certain ministries. We were, by our creation, purposed to be a specific person when living int he glory of God, filled with His Spirit and following His Way. In a way, we were predestined to live certain types of lives according to our uniqueness as individuals. However, this is operates within the greater body of Christ known as the Church. There is a great union between the Church and the Christian. Anyway, if we choose to live in Christ, putting on the new self, living into who we were created to be, now possible through the Spirit, accessing our experiences, giftings, talents, passions, and mind then we will only pursue a few of many options. When we live in accordance with who we are meant to be then all these elements of ourselves will guide us to specific activities. When we say "yes" to Christ and to "here am I" to God then we say "no" to all that is not of Him and to what is not to be a part of ourselves. This limits our options in some ways, no longer permitting us to pursue certain activities, and opening up other options that honor God and use our talents, experiences, passions, gifts and mind. Discernment will lead us.

So we see that living into our intended identity and purpose will lead to us pursuing a limited amount of activities through our lives because we have found the good limitations in our life according to our God-given passions, gifts, mind, and so on. This brings up the question concerning calling. Do we need to hear/receive a specific calling to pursue certain ministries/activities? Do I require a specific calling/command to pursue Christian Peacemaking Teams delegations in order to actually pursue it or is it enough for me to see that it is good work and commit myself to it?

First of all, I believe there are two types of callings for Christians. There is general calling which is for all believers who are a part of Christ's Body on earth. These callings can be done in a myriad of ways both corporately and individually. Sometime these callings will be fulfilled through the specific callings of individuals and communities (but we'll stick to individuals for this article). As stated earlier, we are meant to be a certain individual who performs certain acts of love in the world according to what God has blessed us with. Sometimes God specifically calls us to people, places, or activities and we do well to faithfully say "Here am I Lord, send me!" and obey. God does not always send specific calling though. Sometimes we are living our lives faithfully and allowed to honor God for a time without a specific calling. In these times we operate under the general calling and within the good limitations discussed earlier. These times lacking specific calling may be days or even years. Or perhaps the specific calling we have received is only concerning a type of activity or merely a place or people group and not all three. Perhaps we are not like Jonah, sent with a specific message to a specific people in a specific place. Perhaps we don't have a specific time frame but we know the concept or some single or slightly vague element of our calling and God has kept the rest hidden. Callings are diverse among persons and in their presence within the lives of individuals.

I believe God gives us minds and passions so that we may use them to serve Him. He doesn't need to specifically call us to an activity in order for it to be wise for us to engage in that activity or for Him to be honored by our engaging in that activity. We can do all activities for His glory even if there is no direct and clear personal calling from Him to perform that specific activity (so long as it isn't keeping us from whatever specific callings may exist for us). It is good to do good things because we decided, according to our God-given passions and minds, to do them for the glory of God. I would say this [joining a Christian Peacemaker Teams delegation to Palestine/Israel] is an activity that demands prayer (since there is such a great amount of time between now and then) in case God has reason to say "no" to the endeavor. All worthwhile endeavors that consist of our serving of others and giving up of self deserve prayer. If it involves commitment it deserves prayer. I believe that we, like Paul, are wise to go and do until we are told by God to go elsewhere and do otherwise. If discernment tells us that the activity is good then we should not be discouraged to engage it. If we are in the will of our Father and seeking to glorify Him, having the support of the Church, then we should continue pressing forward, serving however our gifts, passions, minds, and experiences lead us under the guidance of the Spirit.

Have A God If You Want

On the way back from the wedding I was a part of this weekend I had a wonderful passenger in my vehicle. I was giving the photographer of the wedding a lift back to Portland. We were blessed to spend 2 hours together listening to music and discussing life. She was a fantastic and interesting 19 year old girl with some cool religious history. She was raised Catholic and baptized as an infant. Later she started examining her experience, her self, and other "religious options." She now feels she is a deity in the sense that she has power over and in herself and, of course, is attracted to buddhism, though I don't recall her saying she is all that familiar with it in experience or study. She also invests her mind in astrology. One of her first questions to me was "What's your sign?" I thought that was great to finally be asked, especially with a lady on the other end. I wanted to laugh a bit (because that always comes off as a pick-up-line in humorous conversation) but the conversation was sincere and it wasn't the time so we pressed on with our fun conversation.

As we discussed our religious histories (her choice of conversation by the way) she mentioned her tolerance/acceptance of other people's beliefs. She is very concerned with respect and love so we found a lot of common ground. As an undefined pluralist, she is completely happy to say "If you have a god then have a god! Whatever god you want to have for yourself is fine with me." Her message is nothing new to me. It's a very common view. You do you and I'll do me and we can still do we. That whole gig. Her specific words, however, struck a chord in me. I didn't address my thoughts with out-loud words because we had something else going on that I was more than happy to entertain. I thought on her words "If you have a god then have a god! Whatever god you want to have for yourself..." She spoke as if God was something or someone to possess or claim as owned by self.

I wanted to say to her gently, "You speak as if gods are something we shop for in magazines or on a website. We point to one and say , 'Ah yes, that god suits my desires well. I'll take it.' But God, in the way scripture speaks of God is not a thing or even being to own or possess like we would a piece of clothing. We don't exchange gods based on the season, latest trend, or our newest pattern of fancy. No, according to Christian scriptures we are owned by God. We belong to God and while we may come under him and possess him in a sense we are never big or great enough to have power over him. We may treat him like a commodity or a slave but he can be neither in his true nature. At that point we're only fooling ourselves. God is not so small as to be had by man. He may be had by us in the sense that we have him in our lives and within our being (this is true of every person) but we can not lay hold of God like we lay hold of a pair of shoes. He is quite unique. He is... holy. He is different from anything we know in our world, especially the things we have created. He is the source of life and love. He is the source of you and me and we can only give ourselves to him. And he asks us to. Any person who thinks they have God like they have their books, movies, car, phone, bank account, hats, pets, friends, children, toys, or anything else is fooled and serves a small god which is unworthy of their worship. The one true God owns all that exists and tells us that everything he has is ours if we just ask for it. He also tells us that we are his children and he celebrates over us when we return to him and accept Him for who he says He is and who He says we are (His children)."

Side thought: But I didn't say that. And that's fine. We had a delightful talk and she is a wonderful gal. I'm so glad I got to meet her. Meeting new people is always amazing. If this gal and I keep chatting from time to time I'm sure this topic will come up again and we can continue speaking respectfully and enthusiastically with one another. Honest and kind dialogue is, I think, essential for Christians when they speak with the nonreligious or other-religious. Respect and love are seeds for the gospel. I mentioned Jesus, my history, and some of the essential truths I believe and even if I had not I would have felt as though I was faithful to Christ and the spreading of his Gospel by displaying the candor I did. I don't believe we need to speak the Romans Road, recite the Ten Commandments, offer an "alter call" or anything like to to truly communicate the Good News that Jesus is Lord to people. Sure, words and scripture help a great deal but being a good friend, full of love, showing the good in people, and treating them the way we'd wish to be treated is living out Jesus' good news and they'll recognize him well when they see Him if they see you when you imitate him. We're seed planters. We're farmers. It's beautiful.