Christmas Day 2011

God (the One who is able to save) is with us.

“I kneel at the door of the empty stable and offer Thee my heart…but my body is not fit to be Thy temple and my heart is treacherous and faithless. I am ashamed to have so poor a shelter to offer Thee. If it were not that Thou didst ask for it, I dare not offer it. Oh! Thou Who didst not refuse the manger-bed, come to my heart, look at the contrition and…the aching longing to be what Thou dost want, and forget the faithlessness and the failures and the weakness. Come, my little King, incarnate for me, come and save me, If I were not a sinner I should not need a Saviour.”

-Mother St. Paul, Ortus Christi

Why People Don't Get Along

People fail to get along because they fear each other; they fear each other because they don't know each other; they don't know each other because they have not communicated with each other. -Martin Luther King, Jr.

I like Martin Luther King Jr. a lot and I often agree with him. I agree with him to a degree with this quote but I disagree as well. It's true that ignorance can breed contempt. How many movies have been made in which a prejudice person witnesses the demise of their fear and hatred through personal interactions with the very people they hate? Gran Torino and American History X are excellent examples. People do tend to see what they have in common with each other through communication. When we connect with one another it becomes easier to recognize the One who looks through the eyes of our brothers and sisters (for he also looks through ours*). Theimago dei is easier to notice through vulnerable relationships. We're all human. We all have a lot in common according to nature and nurture. So yes, communication can dissolve much fear.

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. (1 John 4:18).

When we love God we are free from fear of the fair judgment he brings. It makes sense then that when we love our neighbors we will fear them and what they may bring into our lives less. Communication is great but love is greater. Communication exists within love. Communication is an aspect of love that leads to deeper love. Just as prayer brings us closer to God so communicating with neighbors brings us closer to them.

Talking to one another helps us to come together. While coming together isn't the end goal it's a nice perk to loving one another. If we seek to love others by communicating with them in a humble, patient, kind, and vulnerable manner then we will eventually grow in love. We may not become best friends with our enemies through a few discussions (though sometimes we will) but we'll see the humanity of one another better and that's a plus.

To know someone is not merely to communicate with them but we can not truly know someone until we communicate with them. Let's talk to Samaritan women at the well, to the children who get in the way, to the Gentile who wants crumbs from the table of Hebrew, and everyone different from us. Whoever we fear, let us begin to love them by getting to know them, building a relationship through communicating with them. Let us start seeing what we have in common. Differences are good and we need to know them but if all we acknowledge are our differences then all we can have for one another is fear and disdain and those have no place in the heart of one who embraces the love of Christ.

*MewithoutYou refers to God when they sing "...the One who looks out from your eyes looks through hers and looks through mine" in their song Bullet to Binary Pt. 2 on their album It's All Crazy! It's All False! It's All A Dream! It's Alright!

The Death of Kim Jong Il

It is reported that Kim Jong Il, dictator in North Korea, died Saturday on a train due to a heart attack (source).

Kim Jong Il's death is worth mourning because he, as a human being who was created in the image of God, was worth loving. God himself does not desire the perishing of wicked men because he is love and has concern for all his creation and thus reaches out to them so that they may seek communion with him (Ezekiel 18:23, 33:11). I pray that Kim Jong Il rests in peace and that God has mercy upon him, a sinner. I pray that Christians would set the example of loving the enemy even in that enemy's death. I pray that the absent are safe within the body of Christ on earth. May we know nothing but Christ crucified (which is love in it's greatest form) so that we may love others to point of dying ourselves rather than seeing them take the fall. May we not scoff at the tragic consequences of Adam's sin in any person's life, for ours is the same story.

All are wicked. All need grace. All need God. All must love.

We must remember that we have all sinned. If we have hated and kept anger we have murdered. We have oppressed. We all have been aligned with the world, darkness, Satan. We were saved by the grace of an all loving God and reconciled to him through his son.

Kim Jong Il, Muammar Gaddafi, Osama Bin Laden, Saddam Hussein, Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, you, the neighbor, and me were meant to be servants who love others. If other's on the list are not doing that then the need for us to do so grows and does not decrease. Government authorities, by God's design and command deserve our honor. Let us be God-honoring in being authority honoring. Let us not speak unloving words of the dead, of the leader, of the wicked. Speak truth but only in love, only with the fruit of the Spirit.

Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human authority: whether to the emperor, as the supreme authority, or to governors, who are sent by him to punish those who do wrong and to commend those who do right. For it is God’s will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish people. Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil; live as God’s slaves. Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor (1Peter 2:13-17).

These words were written during a time of great persecution and unjust rule. It must then apply even now.

There may be justice in Kim Jong Il's death, God knows well enough, but there must be love in our hearts, words, and deeds concerning the dictator. Celebrate that less wickedness may now occur (supposing that's true) and mourn the death of a sinner, praying for the mercy of God, for we've lost a human brother whom we have been told to love. Let us not dance on graves but plant flowers there.

The Pursuit of Happiness Falls Short

Christians who live in the United States often value what the country values. That's often a very good thing but sometimes it's a very bad thing. There are yet other times in which such values simply fall short of the expectations of scripture. Many of us over-value the pursuit of happiness which is such a prevalent value for those in the United States. Everyone wants to be happy. In a lot of ways this is a noble value to embrace but if we are not careful it can be destructive. It's my belief that many of us Christians often pair this value with the absence of persecution and seek to construct lives and a society that aid us in our pursuit of happiness by procuring for ourselves protection from hardships others would bring upon us for our faith. I don't think this should be.

I've written before on how it's good to rethink how much we value freedom of religion and our pursuit of avoiding persecution. I've also written about how the pursuit of happiness isn't sufficient. Here I wish to combine these ideas and I desire to do so by quoting one of the geatest theologians of the 20th century, Dietrich Bonhoeffer. In his bookLife Together, he stated,

Seek God, not happiness - this is the fundamental rule of all meditation. If you seek God alone, you will gain happiness.

Keep in mind that Bonhoeffer wrote these words at a time in which he had returned to Nazi infested Germany from the safety of the United States. He was living out these words, seeking out the will of God over his own happiness, at a great cost. Seeking God often requires a great deal of suffering. It always requires the loss of self. It is never sexy or entirely self-gratifying. It is not a safe pursuit. However, it is a pursuit that rewards richly in a way that is often unexpected. It's an upside down life. Seeking God will force us to gain many a terrible thing but it will also gain us happiness.

Truly, if we seek God we will receive happiness. If we seek happiness we will quickly find that our aim was shortsighted and selfish. When we live as lovers of God, being selfless, giving to God and others through life we find happiness "for it is in giving that we receive" (St. Francis of Assisi). We need a higher goal than our own happiness. We need God. Let us seek God and see what he gives us.

Delight yourself in the LORD; And He will give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:4).

We can value the pursuit of happiness but our pursuit should not be happiness itself. Let us have longsight and seek God himself who is love for in love alone will genuine and worthwhile happiness be found. Any other happiness shall be rotten and not worth pursuit.

Hurt People

There is a cliche in my line of work. "Hurt people hurt people." This means that people who have been hurt or who are currently hurting tend to bring hurt to other people. So hurt(ing) people actively hurt (other) people. Not only is this a popular saying in my life but it's a popular experience. I constantly encounter people who have been hurt who are hurting other people. I can't deny this cliche. I embrace it. I know it's true of me as well. When I am hurt I cause hurt. I believe we all do.

People hurt others in a variety of ways. Some people hurt others through insults, others through physical force, some through passive aggression, and yet others through neglect or abandonment. I'm the third. I tend to cut myself off from others when in pain and that causes problems in my relationships. When I think primarily of myself and neglect others I hurt them as much as if I were verbally or physically abusing them. Neglect is a type of abuse as well. Everyone abuses others in a certain way. This even happens online! I've recently written about keys to communicating well, how to examine if we are loving others well, and how to maintain an attitude of love when others hurt us. Now, I want to ask if this cliche applies to us and how we can examine that.

It's good to ask "Am I hurt?" Some hurts are recent and some are deep seated in us and come from our past. A recent hurt may be the result of an argument with a spouse whereas a deep hurt may be the result of a parent hitting us as a child. Both are important because both hurt and both cause us to hurt others if we allow. Ask if you're hurt right now. Has there been anything recently in your life that has caused you harm? What was it? What happened? Walk through it. Ask why it hurt. Should it have the amount of power that it does in your life? Are you blowing it up? Is it justified? Can you reason it away or does it need more healing than that? It's very possible it's relational pain and healing needs to happen. If that's true then seek out who has hurt you and try to walk through the issue (of your pain) with them. Let them know how you've been hurt and try to reconcile. Try to see how they love you (hopefully they do). Do what you can to help the hurt. If the pain is deep and from the past then, depending on what it is, a conversation may not be enough. Perhaps counseling will help (it's not just for crazy people ya know). Long-lasting pains play a part in forming our identities and we need help to see how they've worked themselves into our personality and social patterns. If we've been abused it's possible we'll be quick to abuse those who we see doing wrong because we've decided we can't stand for abuse to exist (ironic isn't it). Hurt people are fully of sad irony (I sure am). Deep pain take help to remove and they take time. It's hard work but it can be worked out and as it gets worked out we can do our best to try and recognize it when it pops up and demands us to act upon it. As we hurt, identfy our pain, and seek reconciliation/healing, we must make every effort to not give into our hurt and cause hurt to others.

Next we should ask if we are hurting others. That's a part of the healing process. In that argument that recently hurt me did I cause hurt as well? Did I do it because I was hurting? If so, apologies are repentance are in order. We've got to make things right. Am I constantly causing hurt to others? Am I rude, insulting, neglecting, abusive? Are my behavior patterns unhealthy and damaging to those around me? If so it's time to try and form new patterns. Asking others to help us with this is good. We need people to counsel us, asking questions all the time. We need people to call us out on our abusing of others, we need accountability. As I said in the previous paragraph, we need help and we need time. If we're hurting others we can stop doing it but it's hard. Living out the love of Christ is a killer (of self) and denying the desires of our pain and bitterness is a very difficult thing to do.

When other people are being hurtful towards us (though physical or verbal abuse, neglect, or passive aggressive acts) it's good to ask why. Are they intending to hurt or are they unaware? Is there something motivating them to hurt us? People don't hurt others without motivation, there's always a reason (even if they can't name it themselves). How has this person been hurt? Did I cause the hurt that's causing them to hurt me? Remember, people who hurt you are hurting in some way for some reason and even though they're being the bad guy they are probably the victim somehow as well. Even if they aren't they are suffering somewhere within themselves and that means they need healing and that means they need help.

We need to learn to react in love, seeing the person and not the mere situation. We must learn to be careful and thorough observers, taking note of all we can see in front of us in regards to those we interact with. It's hard to seek a fair and balanced perspective, especially when we're trying to have that perspective towards someone who is hurting us or who we want to hurt at that moment, but we have to try and see people as God sees them. We have to see people for who they are (creations of God, loved by him, tainted by sin, living in a broken world, imperfect, and hurting). Patience and kindness go a long way. We may be interacting with someone and realize that the person has been stung with pain and thus the issue is no longer important. At this point we must begin to focus on the person and their pain. Often, the issue is not the issue. That means a person may blow up over a topic of conversation but their issue is not what is being discussed but a pain within them. The pain may be connected to the discussion but it usually has deeper roots than expected. People are deeper than we anticipate (especially online).

We're all hurt in some ways. We all hurt in some ways. None of us want to be hurt and none of us truly want to cause pain for others. In moments we may want to harm others because it's all we know to do as a reaction to our pain but we have to learn to fight this. We also must to learn to heal that when it occurs in others around us. We have to help one another, loving one another, seeking to cover pains with healing and reconciliation.

Paul stated in Ephesians 4:1-3 "I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." He ends a letter to the Corinthians says, "Finally, brothers, rejoice. Aim for restoration, comfort one another, agree with one another, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you" (2Corinthians 13:11). He tells the Church in Rome, "Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality" (Romans 12:10-13).

When the desire to hurt comes up or when someone begins to act out of pain, hurting us, let us remember the Proverbs of scripture which tell us to extinguish the flames of fury and bring peace so that we may love one another. "The beginning of strife is like letting out water, so quit before the quarrel breaks out" (17:14). "A brother offended is more unyielding than a strong city, and quarreling is like the bars of a castle" (18:19). "It is an honor for a man to keep aloof from strife, but every fool will be quarreling" (20:3). "For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, quarreling ceases. As charcoal to hot embers and wood to fire, so is a quarrelsome man for kindling strife." (26:20-21).

The Holy Spirit; Do We Have It?

There came a time, after his resurrection, when Jesus left the disciples and ascended into heaven. In Acts 1 Jesus tells his followers, "...wait for the gift my Father promised, which you have heard me speak about. For John baptized with water, but in a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit." ...But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth" (vv. 4-5, 8). We know from scripture that the Spirit brings peace, power, unity, words in trial, strength, and joy. The kingdom of God is a matter of the Holy Spirit (Romans 14:17). The Christian life is a life lived in the Spirit.

It was clear at Pentecost that the Holy Spirit had come to the followers of Jesus because there were very obvious and tangible signs. The Spirit was acknowledged by the senses of the bystanders. Through flaming tongues, miraculous communication, and an uncommon form of interaction (which looked like drunkenness apparently) it was clear that the Spirit had come in what some might call a new way. However, when sinners are baptised in the Spirit this doesn't always happen, in fact it probably only was meant to happen once but that's a discussion for another time. So how do we know if we, sinners saved by grace who are trying to live a life of faith and good deeds yet falling short as we do our best supposed to know with certainty whether or not we have the Spirit? Will our chests be strangely warmed as some men have said they experienced? Will we speak in the tongues of angels as some have? Is there still some kind kind of sense oriented sign that shouts "LOOK! I have within me the Spirit of God!?" I believe there is.

A large theme in the scriptures is the bearing of fruit. Sometimes there is a contrast between bearing fruit and bearing no fruit (the fig tree Jesus curses for example) and other times there is the contrast between bearing good fruit and bad fruit. Jesus discusses the issue of false teachers saying, "Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire" (Matthew 7:17-19). In John 5:1-8 Jesus says

"I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples."

So good trees ear good fruit and bad trees bad or no fruit. Trees that bear good fruit are gardened by God, the original gardener (think Creation and Eden) and bad trees are apart from God and later meet their end (how could they not? Dead things rot and fall away and are only good for burning). By the way, trees are people in all this garden talk. Jesus refers to himself as a tree in that John passage at the beginning. You and I are trees and we are either good trees that are gardened by God or bad trees apart from him. And how do we know which we are? By our fruit! So what does this fruit stuff have to do with the Spirit? Well, the Spirit also produces fruit. His activity has results just like our activity. When we have the Spirit of God there are certain proofs/fruits that we can observe. These fruits are mentioned by the Apostle Paul in Galatians 5:22-23. "But the fruit of the Spirit is

• love
• joy
• peace
• patience
• kindness
• goodness
• faithfulness
• gentleness
• self-control.

If we can be defined by these terms then odds are we have the Spirit. Unloving, joyless, quarrelsom, impatient, mean, wicked, brimming with denial, coarse, and uncontrolled people are not those who belong to God but are against him. Life in the Spirit looks like the attributes of that verse. If we are out of control, unfaithful, unloving, impatient, and ungentle people then we are not yet living in the love of God, accepting Christ and all he has for us. Part of accepting Christ as Lord is laying down our worldly weapons of the flesh (I don't mean guns and knives but our shallow and sinful practices and desires) and bowing before him. We must put off our old self, dying as though we were on the cross, and putting on the new self as though we have been raised from the grave and been given a new body with which to walk around in. It's like being reborn. We play an active role in our conversion for we decide to cease trying to be the Lord of our own lives; we give up our power of king and we concede it to Christ and we begin to operate under his rule. When we say Christ is Lord we are saying that he is in charge and we are not. He commands us and we obey. This is how we know we love him, we obey him (John 14:15).

As Paul says, "Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit" (Galatians 5:25). We keep in step with the Spirit by pursuing Christ and his Way. As we actively resist the ways of the sinful world and nature that are constantly against us let us seek God in prayer for it is prayer that demolishes strongholds in our lives and makes for us to have the things God wants to give us. It is the Spirit which produces this fruit in us and it is God who sends the Spirit. It is not by our own works that we are people with the fruit of the Spirit but by the grace of God. He desired us and sought us. When we respond to him with faith he gardens us and makes us to bear fruit. It is a partnership and it is a process. The disciples screwed up repeatedly while they walked with Jesus for several years but there came a time when they lived into their faith and the Spirit was given to them by God's will (not their works). They knew Christ was Lord after the resurrection and they lived in that reality of faith and as a result they received the Spirit and through them the world saw love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control unlike anyone else. Other's followed suit and eventually pagan men such as Aristides were writing things like "And see, because of them, good flows on in the world! Truly it is they who have sought and have found the truth, and from what we have understood here we must conclude that they alone are close to the knowledge of truth."

May good flow on in the world because of your faith and your obedience to God. May you see fruit from the Spirit which is promised to those who abandon the world and their own rebellion and finally claim Jesus Christ is Lord! May you lay down your crown at the foot of the cross of Jesus of Nazareth who was later raised and told us of our helper; the Holy Spirit. May the wrestling out of your salvation produce good fruit so that you do not rot, die, and burn away but rather find and produce life that may be enjoyed for eternity (Romans 8:13). Amen.

Keys to Communicating Well

Two of the largest aspects of my job here at Transitional Youth are practicing and teaching good communication and conflict resolution skills. Since coming on board over two years ago I've changed in how I communicate with people. I can debate and work through conflicts/disagreements far better now than before I worked here. I'm far better at these skills than I was even a year ago. I often see people trying to have a debate or discussion on Xanga and notice how they aren't helping their cause due to poor communication skills so I decided to write about a couple characteristics of healthy communication and conflict resolution for anyone who is interested.

Pitching and Receiving

In every healthy interaction there needs to be a catcher and a pitcher. Other terms we use for these positions are encoder and decoder. Our tagline for this is "Know Your Role!" The pitcher/encoder is the person speaking. They are heading up the discussion at the moment. This person is sending a message that they want someone else to receive and receive fully. The other person is catching/decoding. They are working hard to receive and understand what is being said. Making sense of what has come their direction from the encoder/pitcher is their role at the moment. This often consists of something called "active listening." Everyone wants to be heard so active listening requires serious attention. Signs of a healthy active listener:

• Showing the speaker that you are paying attention and trekking with them by saying things such as "Yeah", "okay", "uh huh", "Right", "Oh I see", and so on without disrupting the flow. While this is often employed by people who don't pay attention, eye contact and facial expressions can help communicate serious listening. This can be difficult online. Sometimes it's best to say encouraging things between messages to get this message across.
• Paraphrasing what the pitcher has thrown your way. If you are listening well you can repeat what the encoder has communicated with similar words back to them. If you can communicate their message in a way they approve of then you've successfully decoded. If your paraphrasing isn't accurate then you ask them to "please explain that to me again so I can get a better idea of what you're trying to say?" Paraphrasing in this context is essentially saying to the pitcher "It sounds like you're saying 'suchandsuch blah blah blah suchitysuchsuch', is that about right?" You're putting their message in your language without compromising what they truly mean. They'll let you know if you're hitting the mark or not. Paraphrasing is HUGE!
• Probing during the discussion. Aside from often stopping the conversation momentarily to make sure you are up to speed via paraphrasing it is good to stop the conversation at points and ask open ended questions for clarification. Yes and no questions can be helpful but it's usually best to use questions that force the pitcher to give a fuller explanation of their message. In debate this may look like asking for the support for a specific point of an argument. "How do you back that up?" Why and how questions are good for this.

In a healthy interaction there will be a switching of roles from time to time. Both people involved will ask and answer questions, allowing ample time for the other to answer and explain. Both people will make attempts to convey what they believe the other person is trying to communicate so that there is no miscommunication. When both people are pitching nothing is truly received. Talking at one another is not helpful. Talking with one another is very helpful. Good conversation is like a game of catch. Conversations are not meant to be one sided. Ask and answer questions. Make your points known and let the other person know their points are known. The goal should be for everyone to move forward and that takes teamwork.

Checking the Temperature

My boss likes to call this the Goldilocks Rule but I prefer the temperature perspective. They are the same thing so it doesn't really matter. In every interaction, especially disagreements, debates, and conflicts, there is a temperature. Sometimes the temperature is comfortable and everyone is happy. Sometimes the temperature changes and things got pretty hot and as a result someone operating at a high temperature can't go any further in the interaction without first cooling down. For those interesting in the Goldilocks version, you have to check what bowl of porridge is being consumed. Are things too cold in the interaction and nobody is engaging? Is the porridge too hot and leaving people with burned tongues and frustration? Hopefully the porridge is just right and both people are actively engaging one another without things getting too heated or out of control. Checking the temperature simply means keeping an eye on how the person you're interacting with is feeling. If they feel attacked, angry, hurt, or are showing signs of discomfort it may be time to step back and let them cool down. If it looks like they are comfortable and can handle more of the discussion then feel free to keep it going! Basically, be concerned for and aware of the person you're interacting with so you don't burn the bridge. If you know your own temperature is rising then it may be best to politely step away for a while.

Of course, this can be difficult online since there is no voice tone or body language to observe. However, people can give hints through what they write. A lot of CAPS or exclamation marks (!) can indicate a high temperature. Short answers can indicate a cold temperature. Personalizing the issue is often a sign of the temperature rising and personal attacks are a sure sign that the porridge is too hot. Being aware of the other person's feelings proves that one has a goal of genuine conversation and relationship as opposed to simply winning or being right.

Proverbs

There are a few Proberbs from scripture that I think are helpful in this arena.

• A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions (18:2).
• He who answers before listening— that is his folly and his shame (18:13).
• Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone (25:15).
• Mockers stir up a city, but wise men turn away anger (29:8).
• Do you see a man who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for him (29:20).

At the end of the day, if we can treat others the way we wish to be treated in interactions then things have a better chance of going well.

Ecclesiastes 3; Poetry & Theology

I was reading Ecclesiastes 3 today and I admired the beauty of it. The reality that much of the passage is poetry came alive to me in this reading. The structure of the chapter proves to us that this in fact poetry. It's structured as A) Poetry B) Reflection A) Poetry B) Reflection. It's quite beautiful. It's like reading a poem and then having the author give commentary on the piece, telling the reader what the context of the writing is. What were they thinking about during the writing? What did this art bring out of them? How did it affect the way they see the world and how does it prove the way they see the world for the reader? Having those types of questions answered by an artist is always nice. That's why people enjoy DVD commentaries!

I've argued before that this passage (more specifically, the first poem in the chapter which consists of verses 1-8) is not a declaration of ethics or things permissible for lovers of God but rather observations about the way life is through the eyes of Solomon. Today I saw this again during my reading. Here is the first poem,

There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

While some read this phrase "a time to..." meaning "at times you should/can..." (as though it were a blessing to perform the activity mentioned) I firmly believe it's saying "a time of..." If my reading were correct then this first poem would essentially be communicating that there are times of birth, death, planting, uprooting, killing, healing, tearing down, building up, weeping, laughing, mourning, dancing, scattering stones, gathering stones, embracing, pushing away, searching, quitting, keeping, throwing away, tearing, mending, silence, speaking, loving, hating, war, and peace. When we poetically look at life we tend to throw the good and the bad together. People often use contrasts to paint a picture of the chaos and beauty of life. Life is full of so much stuff that it's easiest to explain how much exists in life by pointing to one thing and then it's antithesis (opposite). I think the opening line of "There is a time for birth and a time for death" sets up the reader to expect a message of "here is what is between birth and death, here is what life consists of." This describing of what life is like through contrast is what Solomon is doing in this poem. He's simply saying that there is a time in which everything happens in life, every activity pops up, from life to death, from war to peace. In life we have the good, the bad, and everything between.

Solomon goes on to give some commentary after this poem. He then writes another poem (which actually appears to be a second half to the first) which is clearly derivitive of his commentary on the first poem. He writes,

Whatever is has already been,
and what will be has been before;
and God will call the past to account.

And I saw something else under the sun:

In the place of judgment—wickedness was there,
in the place of justice—wickedness was there.

I said to myself,

“God will bring into judgment
both the righteous and the wicked,
for there will be a time for every activity,
a time to judge every deed.”

This is what seals the deal for knowing that Solomon is making observations about the reality of life. He walks to the end of the age, a time when judgment from God shall be present, and he states that there will be a time for every activity - a statement which points back to the first poem - and that there will be a judgment for every deed done. Everything will happen and everything will come under the judgment of God. If it were good and permissible to do every activity under the sun, which is the conclusion one must reach if he/she believes Solomon's first poem is a giving of permission and not an observation, then God would have no reason to judge it for it would all be good. There would be no need to divide wheat from chaff, lamb from goats, good from bad. Solomon writes that God will bring into judgment both the righteous and the wicked. Due to there being both righteous and wicked people every activity under the sun will have it's time. In other words the righteous will bring into this world times of love, healing, planting, peace and so on while the wicked will bring into this world times of hate, war, killing, uprooting, and so on.* Yes, there is a time for everything. Everything under the sun will and does have it's time because the righteous and the wicked bear fruit in our reality. Just as Solomon had used contrast earlier in the first poem he is using it in the second. There are the righteous and there are the wicked. There is love and hate, peace and war, birth and death, healing and killing. This is not a mistake and it is not a coincidence. It is intentional poetry which reveals theological truth.

Following this Paul shares a few more thoughts on life in general. That's a key to understanding this whole chapter. Solomon continues to return to the big picture of life. He writes a poem and then gives a commentary which deals with the general reality of life. He's not setting out to write what's ethical or permissible for believers but rather reflecting upon what's true about life. We know this is true because he starts phrases in his commentary with structures such as "I have seen...", "He [God] has...", "I know...", "God tests...", "All have/go...", "Everything is...", "Who knows if..." Like we all do, Solomon is reflecting on the big picture and he's doing it through poetry. This isn't like the Sermon on the Mount where Jesus gives teachings about how to live ethically as citizens of the kingdom of God and it's not like Paul's letters which lay out theological truths and the ethical applications of those truths for the believer. This is good poetry with good theological truth. We can pull some ethical material out of the implications of this work but we must acknowledge that Solomon wasn't writing a work about ethics.

It's beautiful poetry and I'm thankful for it. I'm grateful that we have minds that are able to understand contrast and how to use that tool to draw out the truths of our world. I'm grateful that Solomon brings all human activity, good and bad, to it's end where there exists a good judgment from a good God. Our world is messy but God's going to sort it out. Yes, God mysteriously makes everything beautiful in it's time (v. 11). Everything happens, but it won't always be that way because after there is judgment "there will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain..." (Revelation 21:4). Until that time we should work and toil and enjoy life while doing good. It seems to me that doing good probably consists of things such as planting, loving, making peace, healing, building, and rolling with the punches. May we be mindful of what is to come as we see mourning and laughing and all the contrasts that exist in our world.

*While I would say this is typically a fair look at life I also believe that God, who can make all things beautiful, has righteously initiated killings and "wars" and commanded his righteous people to obey him in those pursuits. Of course, I also believe God can do certain things well that men can not. So while there is the truth that killing and war have been brought about through non-wicked parties it's still commonly agreed that both killing and war are bad things so the contrast method seen in the poem still makes it's point.

Are We Loving?

Even though they are placed in the discussion of spiritual gifts, it is undeniable that the truths proclaimed in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 can stand strong in truth outside of that context. When I evaluate whether or not I am loving others well I look predominantly to these verses. I think of people I have relationships with - sometimes this is the person at church or school while other times it is a significant other, family member, friend, or a person I regularly give help to. In routine and in trial (especially in trial) it can be easy to blind ourselves to how weak our love for another person may be. It is easy to give other's less than love demands. This is an invitation to evaluate yourself. Think of someone you're in relationship with, maybe the person you're having the most difficulty or conflict with (I try to pick this person often since I believe that the person I love the least is the truest indication of how I love Jesus) and then take a minute for each of the following question categories.

As I aim to love [insert name]...

• Am I patient with them? Through whatever we deal with together and whatever they do to test me, am I patient? Do I withstand time when it is not in my favor with this person? Have I been impatient lately?

• Am I kind towards them? Despite what they do or say to me, do I treat them kindly with words and attitudes of blessing? Do I seek their well-being with how I treat them? Have I been unkind lately?

• Am I envious towards them? Do I see the blessings or possessions in this person's life and desire them for myself? Do I hold what I don't have against them? Do I hold what they have against them? Have I been happy for the blessings in this person's life lately?

• Am I boastful towards them? Is humility evident in my interactions with this person? Am I speaking too much and too highly of myself? Do I put myself over and above this person loudly? Have I been a servant to this person or praised them in thankfulness lately?

• Am I arrogant in front of them? Have I been presenting an attitude of selfish pride? Do I believe or act as if this person owes me anything. Do I see myself as deserving worship of some kind, getting upset when they don't admire me to the level I think I have earned? Have I put them first lately?

• Am I rude towards them? How would other's characterize my treatment of this person? Have I been short with them, insulting, patronizing, sarcastic, or stuck up towards them? Do I belittle or disrespect this person, whether I think they deserve it or not? Have I been truly honoring towards them lately?

• Am I insisting on my own way with them? How often am I trying to get what I want out of this relationship? Do I find ways to manipulate or persuade them to give me what I want. Do I forsake the desires of this person? Could I be called selfish towards them? Have I been selfless, seeking their wants lately?

• Am I irritable with them? Do I arrive quickly at anger or annoyance with the person? Have I lacked grace in our interactions? Do I see more negatives than positives when I have this person in my mind or sight? Have I been affectionate with them lately?

• Am I resentful towards them? Are there things I have been holding against this person? Have I not let go of past conflicts or trespasses? Am I often looking to hurt the person or trap them so that I can feel a sense of justice? Am I letting this person's shortcomings and failures define them in my heart? Have I been forgiving lately?

• Am I rejoicing in doing wrong towards them? Is pleasure within my soul when I've hurt this person or 'got one over' on them? Do I tell others about how I 'showed them' and find pride in this accomplishment? Do I see gaining power over this person as a type of victory? Have I rejoiced in what is true and good lately even if it is difficult?

• Am I bearing all things with them? Am I honestly sharing in all their joys and pains? Do I see their sin as something I must also carry even though they have committed the trespass? Do I see myself as being their supporter and teammate? Am I living in true unity? Have I ben self-sacrificial in co-owning their baggage lately?

• Am I believing all things for/with them? Can a confidence in what is not yet or what is unseen be found in my spirit for this person's life? Do I trust them? Do I give them the benefit of the doubt, believing they can live into the image of God? Do I think good things are possible for this person? Have I been doubting or skeptical of them lately?

• Am I hoping all things for them? Do I see their potential and cling to it, knowing they may not reach it but never abandoning the possibility that they may live into what they seek? Have I given up on them? Am I prone to write this person off due to bumps in the road? Have I gone against what looks like reality lately for the sake of clinging to the knowledge that God can do mighty and reforming things in them lately?

• Am I enduring all things with them? When they hurt me repeatedly and don't treat me the way they ought to do I continue loving them? Am I forgiving them as they put nails in me? Am I allowing trials and troubles to stop me from extending to this person the love they may not deserve? Have I been sticking to my commitments or vows to this person even if they haven't lately?

Finally, I always ask "How did Jesus show his love for me?" and when I have remembered this wonderful answer I ask "Am I extending that same deep and precious love to this particular person?" Too often the answer isn't pleasing to know and I have to face the fact that I have some changing to do in my heart and in my actions. May you find yourself in a better place of love than I often do and may you continue to do your very best at loving others, knowing that the one you love the least is the truest indication of how you love the LORD your God. May you repent, changing directions, when you discover you've loved poorly or not at all. May the stone covering that might be covering your heart melt away and may you be enabled and encouraged to love others as Christ has loved you. May you be love as God is love, fulfilling it's ways.